How To Keep Your Cool

 

 

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How’s everyone doing? Just another thanks to everyone viewing my blog. It’s been a fun week for me, I discovered nutri-gram bars. 

So, are you like ever at the club and yo boi comes up to you and he is like “yo man why you grinding up on ma gurl? like go get yo own girl, b4 we have a problem”

If so, man have you come to the right/ maybe and or possibly the wrong place! 

 

  1. Don’t be a giant douche bag
  2. Maybe instead of Abrocrombie and Fitch wear some JC Penny clothes, who knows? 
  3. Stay home and play video games
  4. Realize that you may just make a fool out of yourself and you are just wasting time trying to mess with people and pick fights, maybe you could just go try to meet some girls, that still doesn’t work? just come over to my house and play video games, it’s very fun.
  5. If you start getting angry go somewhere and just cry your eyes out. 
  6. Give Casey a high five, she is good at that and she always keeps her cool! 
  7. maybe when someone is making you really upset you can just ask them to shut their face. 
  8. Read my blog
  9. make some pastries and eat them until all the sadness, anger, or whatever goes away so you can get back to hitting on girls 4 years younger than you in the public hot tub
  10. If someone is talking smack about you, just go slice their tires, 
  11. have some hot babes rub oil over your shoulders and you breathe heavily like you are on round 4 of a boxing match
  12. play with Lego’s it will really get your mind set off things so you can build whatever, whenever! 
  13. Don’t wear snap backs. 
  14. If you see people wearing Nike high socks, just know they are already breaking tip #1 and #13 and follow #5
  15. Always have what I call a Hype buddy, when you get all whatever you’re feeling and want to calm down talk to the hype buddy, he/she will talk to you about their recent trip to the Doctor’s and you’ll be like ” what no way! since when did Dr. James get Polio?” 
  16. Maybe make some arts and crafts? I bet your mother is dying for new pottery
  17. Just be a nice person, talk to people, Don’t point yourself out as the #1 king, it never works
  18. make sure you have at least 10 pictures of cute puppies on your phone, so when you want to be angry just be like one sec, I got puppies to look at. Man that puppy is cute
  19. Start a Rec volley ball team, those always work out to how they should be!! 
  20. sign up for some sensual laser tag, I know what you’re thinking “woah Steven, that’s weird, what in the world is sensual laser tag?” Ill tell you what it is, it’s laser tag, but a bit more sensual and maybe more of a Matthew Mcconaughey or Catherine Zeta Jones look to it.

 

Hey thanks for reading this, it means a lot. If you like this blog be sure to bring it up at your next book club meet while your friend Saul is like “hey man this cookie cake is great! where did you get it” be like “Target, now go read Exceptional Yet Lovely!” 

BOOOOOOSH!! 

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