Meeting girls at the club



“UMH UMH UMH UMH UMH UMH UMH” The music pounding violently as Josh stares across the room spying out a girl with sweat dripping down her neck.

“Daniel you dog, you.” Pete interrupts in into Josh’s mid session eye Passion session.

“took you long enough to get here”

“my bad man, I had to, uhhh I had to pick up some clothes for Jennifer” 

“still with Jennifer, I see?”

“Josh we are married, you were the best man.”

“hold my drink,boss”. Josh walks over the girl with the sexy yet maybe not sanitized like a normal human being sweat dripping beauty. 

“hey girl, I saw you on sale at amazon…Mmmm not one bad review. 4.8/5 stars girl.”


“the only complaint, you are just to darn….Sexy, eh?”

“ahhhh that’s the sweetest thing any guy has ever said to me”

“you cool with me treating you like complete garbage and not replying to your calls and maybe one day in the future leaving you in poverty and loneliness?” 

“YEAH! want to get out of here?”

“girl you read my mind,mmm You a gypsy?” 

“I might be…” the girl smiles in a way, just a weird way

“eh girl, I knew it, the sweat and the mind reading, you are a gypsy after all.” 

The girl is just absolutely embarrassed in front of her friends,picks up her drink and splashes it all over Josh’s face


Paul Ryan quickly bikes in and reps out 46 crunches, then pumping out 19 push-ups, still a good number after being tired from 46 crunches!

“Josh, this bozo bothering you?”

“yeah, she threw Jameson on the Rocks at me” 

“I’ll teach you to mess with him”

The battle begins Paul Ryan and Josh Romney hold hands and chant 

“America Unite, Guns unite, pro life unite,”

the two soon form into some kind of spectral light…..from the light comes….Ronald Reagan. 

The girl stares at Reagan who stands 6”8 with glowing fists of fire.

“this outta teach you to mess with america you pagan, liberal, Gypsy, Nazi”

“I just came here to get drinks with my girl Julia!!” 

Reagan throws a fist at the girl crushing her skull with her falling on the ground. 

the bartender freaking out “Hey Romney/Ryan GET OUT OF HERE!!”

The two form back into their selves

“gotta go Josh, my wife and I are doing some P90X warmups” 

“See ya!”

“Hey, Josh! You and the running vice president just killed that girl!” Bartender still angry

“Don’t worry, I got cleanup, Clinton get in here”

“hey thanks josh I knew you were cool” Bill drags the girl outside the back

“I’m calling the cops”



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