Archive | August 2016

Homeless Shelters vs Animal Shelters

Okay so let’s talk about the age long question, homeless shelters and animal shelters, which one is better, more fun and better for the environment? So let’s start by defining what each thing is! Unfortunately, I was contacted by Webster’s dictionary and was told not to use their definitions unless I wanted a law suit. Since I’m already in one between my ex-wife Stacey I said no way Jose, so I’ll be using my own definition.

Animals: Things people want

Homeless People: Things people don’t want

Shelters:  Huts and shit

So Animal shelter: Things people want in huts and shit? Homeless people shelters: Things people don’t want in huts and shit? Well this doesn’t seem right, We will have to investigate further.

Homeless Shelters:


Homeless shelters are like the girls from high school who wear hats on Thursdays, they’re trashy and smell like musty-ass Dior. People love homeless shelters, they provide food and hats for the homeless people, but people also hate homeless people, so why do they provide shelters? This is like the U.S Military building urban apartments for members of ISIS to go in and chill, play ping pong and watch the Hobbit trilogy. Homeless shelters vary from animal shelters mainly for one reason, they’re people, just like us(LOL). Another reason to differentiate, is that people don’t go to visit homeless shelters and look at and play with the homeless people, mainly because they’re not cute. Homeless shelters can be cool though, because you can go and get soup and large hoodies. Mainly homeless shelters are boring and lame.

Animal Shelters: maxresdefault

Okay! Animal shelters are way more enjoyable than boring old homeless shelters. Inside animal shelters, people can go and play with puppies and kittens that people threw out from their windows. Instead of buying a pure bread, much more superior and enjoyable pet, people can go and spend little to no money rescuing a gross, smelly and probably infested animal. One thing the animal shelter provides is euthanasia, which is a nice way of saying killing an animal, but not like Harambe killing or whacking it in the head with a hammer. No, euthanasia is a simple shot that causes death within an animal, something that homeless shelters have probably looked into, but weren’t able to proceed with because of various laws. Animal shelters aren’t just for killing animals, they’re a sanctuary copied after homeless shelters, stealing their style from the Fall 2006 catalog.

Overall, both shelters go against nature and Herbert Spencer’s “survival of the fittest”, just let the dang people and animals run around and be free!